I feel like I am moving backward. Like the life I thought I would lead is some big running joke with The Fates. I know that no one's future is for certain due to the choices we make every day, but really? Is this where life has decided to take me? It isn't where I dreamed of. It isn't where I wish I was.
Everyone always makes statements to me about how strong I am or how they admire my strength. How I don't have to have a relationship define me. Or how I can go through hell but still come out on the other side unscathed. Well to those people I say this: I put on a good facade. I know exactly what to say and do to make you smile and turn away thinking everything is fine. It isn't.
We are far too much alike. I hate that we've become so good @ "faking it". Why can't we show our true feelings to others? Where is our happiness? Is it true that we make our own destiny? Do we have control? ILY.
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